Dear Mommy,

Ping-Ping here. Camp is sure a not-fun place. It has rained every day I've been here just about.

The first day, it rained. We sat in the lunchroom and learned how to make a leather wallet. I told them I didn't have any money or even a pocket, but I hadda make it anyway. It is ugly. I hid it in the trash can.

The second day, it rained.

The third day, it rained.

The fourth day, it rained, but Mr. Smith, the counselor for us cubs, said if he had to spend one more day cooped up indoors with us, he wouldn't be held accountable for the consequences. When I get home, will you help me look up the words 'accountable' and 'consequences'? He looked straight at me when he said it too.

So we went outdoors and walked in the mud. They called it a 'nature walk', which, Pan-Pan says, means you get to eat outdoors, get dirty, and go potty behind a bush. Now this is not too different from how most bears live, so I don't see the adventure in it myself. Chocolate Chip got something called "poison ivy". Pan-Pan got a thorn in his foot. I didn't hurt anything.

Can you get bug juice out of my white ruffle, do you think? I smooshed this really neat bug and some of it got on my ruffle. Mr. Smith made a funny face and said it smelled bad. The guys all thought it was neat and the girls all screamed and ran off. That was really fun, Mom.

After the nature walk thing, we played softball. I threw the ball REALLY hard and accidentally hit Mr. Smith somewhere he said wasn't a good place to be hit. Course he didn't say that until much later because he lost his voice for a long time for some reason, and he was walking real funny too. We all laughed. I don't think he liked it much.

The fifth day, we learned how to paddle a canoe. This was really cool, Mom! I was in one with Chip and Pan-Pan and Mr. Graves, who is a lot more fun than Mr. Smith. We found out that the canoe paddles would just reach up to these really big beehives that were in some tree branches we went under. You should have seen Mr. Smith - who was in the canoe in front of us - when two of those beehives sort of accidentally fell into his canoe! I never saw a human actually dance the Macarena in a canoe before. Mr. Graves said some of what Mr. Smith said was "french", but I don't think so. Did you know that it takes 3 hours to pull out 125 bee stingers?

After the canoe trip, we learned to ride horses. I loved it. They were little horses just our size. Mine was sort of brownish with a white star on his face, and his name was "Spot".

Did you know if you kick a horse, he will run really fast? And that if you stand up on the saddle, you will fall off and knock the breath out of yourself and see stars? That was the coolest thing I did all week, Mom! I think Mr. Smith thought so too, he said "Dear Lord, give me strength" and "Just let me live long enough"...so I think he is planning to stand up on HIS saddle next time we go horseback riding.

The sixth day, we learned how to fish. We stood on this dock and learned how to cast a line into the water using a cane fishing pole. I found out that you have to throw the line out really hard to get it to go far when you're only 2 1/4 inches tall. So I threw my line out SO hard....and I tugged and I yanked, and I pulled..and Mr. Smith fell into the water. I don't know how that happened, because *I* didn't put the fish hook in his earlobe, I just swung the fishing pole really hard. He looks real strange, all lumpy from the beestings and now this big bandage over his ear. He's starting to look at me funny, Mom, and his whole face twitches real fast now. Don't guess he wants to adopt me.

The seventh day, we packed to come home. Mr. Smith wasn't there any more. Somebody said he had checked into the local looney bin for a long rest. Gosh, I hope it wasn't something *I* did. I've been a very good bear all week Mom. Can we have honeycakes and sunflower seed cookies tonight?

Love, your bear, Ping-Ping

PS, I am very very hungry and have been very very good.